


Couldn't Stay Away

by danfics (starlight_brigade)



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst, Reader-Insert, Self-Insert
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-16
Updated: 2018-07-16
Packaged: 2019-06-11 08:58:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,530
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15312012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlight_brigade/pseuds/danfics
Summary: Dan "Commitment Issues" Avidan breaks up with you. You sleep with an ex. He finds out.(There's a happy ending I promise)





	Couldn't Stay Away

**Author's Note:**

> This was a request fill from my [Tumblr](https://danfics.tumblr.com/)!

You knew you shouldn’t have done it. Any of it. 

Everything about it felt wrong. Before, during, and now, as you looked at the dreadfully familiar figure sleeping next to you in your bed. It wasn’t who you wanted it to be. Your head was pounding. You had had a rough night. 

You knew it was rationally wrong to blame Dan on your poor decision-making, but it was hard not to see causality in the sequence of events. 

You knew from the beginning that it was a very, very bad idea to date a colleague. Worse to develop strong feelings. Even worse than that to imagine any kind of long-term future with that person, especially when they’re afraid of commitment. It was supposed to be casual. It had started out that way. But it was so hard to resist falling in love with Dan when he was so… _him_. He was sweet and good-natured almost to a fault. He could make you laugh until you couldn’t breathe. Not to mention the fact that he was handsome as all hell and amazing in bed. He checked every box for you, and as a result, you found yourself thinking about him more than you should. Almost constantly. Your friends diagnosed you with love, and you couldn’t seriously disagree. 

You thought he felt the same way too. You thought you had seen it in the way he looked at you, in his gaze’s vast adoration. You could have sworn that you felt it in his touch — caring, gentle, intentional and true.

So you told him. Softly and sincerely, gingerly and carefully, like he was a nervous animal and your words would scare him into running away: you were in love with him. 

You should have known he would run. He was so flighty. Your mother always said that you can’t fix a man; if he doesn’t want to change for you, he won’t. But you could have sworn Dan was changing. You could have sworn it was for you. 

You had wished it was for you. 

It came in a text. _‘I don’t think we should see each other anymore.’_

You told yourself it was no big deal. That it wasn’t you, it was him. You tried not to remember how he felt when he was lying next to you, holding you in the dark. You tried to pretend that you would be the same person without him, that he hadn’t changed you as much as you hadn’t changed him. 

But in the end, it was futile. You cried yourself stupid over too many drinks, your friend having failed to recognize when you had hit your limit. He did cut you off at one point, letting you know you had had too many, and taking you home before you could get to the point of blacking out. He made sure you got inside safely, and as he went to leave, your senseless base emotions implored him to stay. The look in your eyes, tear streaks still staining your reddened face, wore him down. 

You had broken up with him amicably a year and a half prior, a mutual understanding that your love had faded, and he had never, would never admit that he still had feelings for you, favoring instead the satisfaction of simply having you around. He was happy for you when you were dating Dan. He was there for you when Dan had ended it. And he couldn’t resist you now, your advances even in an inhibited state something that he had missed for a long time. 

Now you sat up in your bed, staring at his sleeping form. You couldn’t remember what exactly had happened after that kiss that you had almost forced on him. But he hadn’t resisted. And that was the kind of shit that confirmed that it was better for you to stay away from him. 

A confused and frustrated interaction after he had woken up had left you seeing him out your front door. 

You almost wished you hadn’t accompanied him, because if you hadn’t, you wouldn’t have seen Dan, on his way to your door, stop in his tracks. You wouldn’t have seen the look of confusion be drowned out by realization as he worked out what he had just seen. 

“What are you…?” You wouldn’t have felt the immense guilt that came with putting together what he was probably there for followed by what he thought he had just seen. 

“Doesn’t matter.” His expression was painfully calm as he shook his head and turned to leave back the way he came. 

“Dan, wait,” you heard yourself call after him, but he didn’t stop.

He was gone. 

You had done so well, playing it cool, not wanting to jeopardize either your or Dan’s career because of this. Dan or not, your friends were there, and you would never have a job as fun as this again. But his avoidance made the pain worse, and you felt like you needed to resolve the tension. Somehow. 

You took longer than you needed to at the Keurig making your coffee, knowing that Dan would come to the wet bar for his Skittles at some point. He had to. He always did. And sure enough, after you spent an awkwardly long amount of time preparing your hot beverage, Dan strode in.

“Hey,” you greeted, trying to be as collected as possible. 

He was distracted, fresh out of a conversation with someone else. All he spared for you was a momentary glance, a tight smile, and a nod of acknowledgement. He grabbed what he came for, and was in the process of turning around to leave.

“Dan.” You reached out and put your hand on his arm, stopping him without force. He was looking everywhere but directly at you. “Will you just fucking talk to me?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say.” His remark was hushed as he checked your surroundings for witnesses. He was trying hard not to cause a scene. 

You didn’t know how to answer that. What did you want him to say? That he really did love you back like you had suspected? That he was sorry for ending it? That he wanted you just as badly as you wanted him?

“Anything,” you said. Whatever you wanted to hear, you wanted it to be the truth. 

“Okay, here’s something,” he said, carefully and quietly, “Leave me alone for a minute. How’s that? Shit like this makes it worse.”

His pained expression said leagues in place of the words he didn’t know how to say. “Makes what worse?”

Dan opened his mouth to say something, but he couldn’t find the words. His eyes went everywhere, searching for them, trying to put them together in a way that made sense. “I just… I can’t…” His eyes closed as he breathed out once through his nose, collecting himself. “I don’t know. I thought… I don’t know what I thought. Maybe that you wouldn’t get over it so fast. Like I might have time to come back and apologize? And tell you that…” He trailed off in another deep breath, running his hand through his hair and shaking it. “That I tried to stop thinking about you but I couldn’t.”

He looked at you, expecting some kind of response that he didn’t get in your stunned silence. Your eyes were large in both surprise and concern as you heard him confirm every suspicion that you had had before. 

“I thought that maybe avoiding you would give me time to let everything pass and go away, but it hasn’t. And I guess it’s because I really do feel that way about you. I…” You saw him struggle to make himself say it, almost reluctantly. “I love you. I really do. And I haven’t felt that way about someone in… a long time. And it scared the shit out of me.”

“Dan…” your words caught in your throat, barely coming out as a whisper. You didn’t know what to say. 

“And I’m sorry. I’m so fucking sorry, for everything, for the shit I said, for the shit I _tried_ to do. I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay.” You came closer, reaching out and touching him. Starting as his chest, your hands traveled aimlessly, relishing in the feeling of which you had been deprived. “I’m sorry too.”

As he reciprocated your touch, absentmindedly placing his hands on your waist, he snorted. “For what?”

“I don’t know, for making you think that I stopped caring? Or… I don’t know. For making you fall in love with me, I guess. Because love fucking sucks sometimes.” 

You laughed, basking in the sound of his own that he let out in response. “Yeah, it kinda fucking does.” Your hands had ended up laced around his neck, gently guiding him down so he could press his smile to yours. You didn’t fully realize how much you had missed the feeling of his lips on your own until you were forced to be without it. 

You pulled away and looked at him fully, meeting his warm gaze. “Does this mean we’re okay now?”

He giggled. “ _More_ than okay.”


End file.
